Folks keep banding around the word ‘rape’ to explain how they feel, but paying tax is not ‘rape’ and although the dwp assessments are cruel, vile and wicked neither are they ‘rape’. Ye it is a word used in bygone days for various meanings, even with a little legendary terminology such as in ‘the vikings “raped” and pillaged’. But the reality is that the word rape is about an act of sexual attack in order to hold power over someone. Its not sexual gratification, not passion, not sexual frustration, it is purely abuse, assault and battery, of the most absolute intimate nature by a powerless person wanting power over someone else. It is akin to all abuse only in someway worse for it strips a person of their self worth, their confidence and makes them feel vulnerable, valueless, objectified, belittled, angry and scared. It destroys some and effects all.
Every kind of abuse is terrible, none is better than another, all steal something of their belief in humanity from the survivor, but so very often victims of abuse feel guilt, many knowing their attacker / perpetrator, they feel shame and we all can sit here rationalising it because we know its not their fault, not their shame, those belong solely to the aggressor, but surviving abuse shakes at best or at worst destroys rationale.
So please folks before saying you have felt as if raped when something negative happens, just have a little think and use a more appropriate term. I can only imagine the feelings of any abuse survivor and hope few of you have experienced it.