Corrupted youth

I am painting a picture with my mind.
These words are for me so don’t be kind,
I am enclosed in a room of magnolia cream
The drab mono-colour causes me to scream

Feeling so very trapped within this un-life
Every comment offending with unintended strife.
It’s as if i live within a sepia silent film set
No longer searching for that challenge still not met.

My motivation has gone from this empty me.
My body and soul longing to live near the sea.
I don’t recognise this person I have now become
I just want to write stories whilst sat in the sun!

The inner me still fights and claws to get out
The tension still there as if I really need to shout!
Where has that which was me now finally gone
That bright good within that to me really shone.

I am still here somewhere hidden from sight
That young boys soul that was full of light.
The journey so far now going nowhere good
A miserable man where an innocent boy once stood.