Fibro

Well am completely immobile now with this fibro attack. Too exhausted to move. Too much pain to properly sleep. Need hands, arms, feet and legs chopping off. Like the monty python knight.
Feeling miserable but not sad, weak but determined, irate but not angry, frustrated but calm.
Its now that I truly remember that I am ill, that this is a disability and that I cannot live as before. I will again forget.
The last rays of a wasted day are now seeping into my bedroom. My open door showing the dark bleak passage out from where I am to where I need to be.
This disease, syndrome or whatever the hell it is truly does isolate us from friends, from focus, from meaning, from reality and yes from life.
Don’t send hugs for today even hugs will hurt.
See you when this is over
Jonesy